


hold you

by wearing_tearing



Series: reality warping [10]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff, Getting Together, M/M, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-War Bucky Barnes, mentions of BDSM
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-01-23
Packaged: 2019-03-08 13:58:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13459701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wearing_tearing/pseuds/wearing_tearing
Summary: Steve’s hands tremble when he settles his palms against the curve of Bucky’s hips. “Who do you want?”





	hold you

**Author's Note:**

> thank you to [portraitofemmy](http://archiveofourown.org/users/portraitofemmy/) for the quick beta <3

Steve swipes the sweat off his forehead, back protesting as he makes his way upstairs to his soon-to-be-old apartment. There are only a few boxes left, everything packed neatly and ready to be moved, and Steve can’t wait to be done so they can get out of here.

There are a lot of good memories attached to this place, but Steve is ready to move on to bigger and better things. His new apartment has an actual _balcony_ leading from one of the windows and Steve is eager to sit there and sketch his new surroundings.

“Bucky?” Steve yells and moves further into the living room, accidentally kicking one of the boxes filled with old art supplies. “Did you get everything?”

The lack of answer from Bucky brings a frown to Steve’s face. Steve left Bucky in charge of getting the heavier boxes from his bedroom, knowing he wouldn’t be able to carry them down to Bucky’s trunk.

“Buck?” Steve asks as he walks to the bedroom, hand reaching into his pocket for his phone in case he needs to call for help. “Did you get crushed by one of the boxes? Did you die? Will I have to keep living here because your ghost will be haunting the apartment?”

It takes a second but then Steve hears Bucky’s voice, muffled and a little faint when he says, “No, I’m fine!”

Steve’s frown deepens. He’s known Bucky his whole life, and that definitely doesn’t sound like he’s fine. “You don’t sound like it. Are you still in my bedroom?”

“Yes! But don’t come in—”

“What is going o— _Oh_ ,” Steve gasps, coming to a halt at the door of his bedroom, cheeks flaming red and lungs tightening in shame. “Oh my god.”

Bucky is in his bedroom, alright.

Bucky is in his bedroom and he has one of Steve’s duffles open on top of the bed, some of the contents spread across the mattress. Bucky is staring at him, wide-eyed and flushed, his fluffy hair a mess of curls on top of his head, like he’s been running his fingers through it. He looks equal parts embarrassed and so very _very_ sorry.

“I’m sorry!” Bucky makes an aborted move towards Steve, but stopping at the end of the bed before he can reach him. “I just— I thought you’d forgotten something or that maybe this was one of the duffles with stuff you wanted to donate, so I opened it to check and…” he trails off, sneaking a glance to the bed, the pink on his cheeks deepening to a deep red.

“And you found my gear,” Steve says faintly, not knowing whether to run away screaming or break down laughing.

“Yes,” Bucky breathes out, worrying at his bottom lip as his eyes flicker to the duffle again. “I found your gear.”

The ropes mock them from the bed, a dark blue that is joined by gags in various sizes. One of Steve’s paddles peeks from inside the bag, unassuming. From here, Steve can also see his assortment of cockcages, a couple of nipple clamps, his spreadbar, and one of his tail plugs.

“Okay.” Steve swallows past the lump in his throat, trying to ignore the way his heart wants to burst out of his chest. This is not the worst thing that’s ever happened to him. He knows Bucky would never judge him for it and Steve refuses to be embarrassed by what he likes. Even though having your best friend find your sex gear is pretty embarrassing. “Okay, well, now you know. We don’t ever have to talk about it again.”

Steve goes to the bed and starts to carefully put everything away, his entire face aflame. He doesn’t look at Bucky when he grabs one of his spider gags, hands shaking, or when he rearranges his paddles so everything can fit. He does pause when he feels Bucky’s presence by his side, the warm line of his body close to Steve’s own.

“Steve,” Bucky says tentatively, one of his hands coming to rest in between Steve’s shoulder blades, “we really don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to…”

Steve’s heart stops and then starts up again in his chest, tripping over itself. “I don’t see why we would,” he says, fidgeting with one of the ropes.

Bucky clears his throat, his palm a brand of heat against Steve’s skin. “Well… I…” he stops, and Steve can feel the brush of Bucky’s chest against his shoulder when Bucky takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. “Those clamps look interesting.”

Steve twirls around to face Bucky, Bucky’s hand falling from his back to hang limp at his side. Steve know he’s gaping, but he can’t really help himself. He shakes his head, trying to clear his thoughts.

Bucky couldn’t possibly mean...

Steve narrows his eyes. “If you just want to know more about it because you’re curious, then there are some good resources I can link you.”

Bucky stares at him, eyes bright and still a little wide in surprise. There’s something behind them, though, that sets Steve’s heart to motion again, the butterflies in his stomach he sometimes gets around Bucky coming back in full force.

“What if…” Bucky worries at his bottom lip, the skin already red and a bit swollen. He doesn’t look away from Steve, though, even as he ducks his head a little, shy. “What if I wanted to… to try?”

Steve’s breath hitches, hands itching to reach out and touch Bucky. “There are some people I could introduce you to,” he says, hating a little bit the way his voice breaks.

Bucky’s head snaps up at that, lips turning down at the corners for a second before his expression smooths out again. “Steve,” he takes a step closer, close enough to touch, “I don’t want _some people_.”

Steve has to bite down on the inside of his cheek not to whimper. His breathing is shallow, heart beating so fast inside his chest that Steve thinks Bucky can hear it.

Steve’s hands tremble when he settles his palms against the curve of Bucky’s hips. “Who do you want?”

Steve has a pretty good idea of what Bucky’s answer is going to be. He’s hoped for it since they were sixteen and Bucky took him to Coney Island for his birthday. It was an entire day spent with just the two of them, having fun and laughing.

Steve just never thought Bucky could ever want the same thing.

Bucky’s hands slide from Steve’s skinny arms up to the side of his neck, thumb brushing at the edge of Steve’s jaw. Bucky leans in, their noses brushing, his eyes clear and serious when he says, “You. I want you. I’ve always wanted you.”

Steve doesn’t waste another second. He tilts his head up and catches Bucky’s lips in a kiss, deep and urgent and a little bit uncoordinated. Their teeth clink together before Steve angles his head, Bucky’s sweet mouth opening up for Steve to taste.

“I want you too,” Steve murmurs, teeth tugging at Bucky’s bottom lip. “Just so we’re clear.”

“It’s clear,” Bucky gasps. “Super clear. As clear as the sky in the summer.”

Steve laughs, the sound swallowed by Bucky’s mouth against him a second later. They kiss inside of Steve’s near empty room, eager and deep, making up for lost time.

“I can’t believe it took us this long,” Bucky says with a giddy laugh, cupping Steve’s face between his hands and pulling him in for another kiss.

“I can’t believe you decided to tell me after finding out I’m into dominating people,” Steve answers, and then smirks at the full body-shiver Bucky gives against him. “Oh? That does it for you? Knowing I want to tell you what to do?”

“Yes,” Bucky admits, eyes dark and lips swollen red.

Steve nuzzles Bucky’s cheek and then presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth. He knows there’s a lot more they need to discuss before they start anything, but he can’t resist saying, “You’re gonna be a good boy for me?”

Bucky whimpers, a tiny little soft sound that goes straight to Steve’s gut. “Yes, Steve.”

“Good,” Steve says, brushing a chaste kiss to Bucky’s mouth before pulling away. “Now help me bring all of this down. We still have a few boxes to carry.”

Bucky gapes at him for a second before his shocks turns into amusement, his eyes crinkling in the corners when he laughs. “Right, sure. Moving first, kinky sex later?” he asks, hope making his eyes shine.

“Moving first, kink negotiation later,” Steve corrects him, going on his tiptoes so he can drop a kiss to Bucky’s jaw. “Then we can see about the sex.”

Bucky sighs, lips pressed to Steve’s temple. “I’ll hold you to that.”

Steve grins, leaning in close so their lips are almost touching, and says, “I’m counting on it.”

With that promise, Steve grabs Bucky’s hand and pulls him out of the apartment. They still have work to do, but then they can have fun.

Oh, _so much_ fun.

**Author's Note:**

> [on tumblr](https://hawkguyz.tumblr.com/post/170038962161/hold-you) :D


End file.
